Lost Without You
by MortalAcademy
Summary: Magnus Bane thinks he's dreaming-but is he?-of Alec Lightwood no longer being around. He's left the physical world. Is he really gone?


**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters, they belong to the wonderful Cassandra Clare.**

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_The moon had took its place in the midnight sky, it had shone its light through the crack between the curtains that sheltered the majority of the light from the room. A small lamp sit across from the bed, on top of the cabinet, the light flickered on and off regularly. They had gone to bed early that night, after a busy day of demon hunting and waiting of ungrateful clients, so they had passed up on making love for a well rested sleep instead. Though Magnus would of said it was well rested, while his mind was searching the heavens and creating dreams from wonderful memories with Alec. That was until a dark shroud cracked through the clouds and swallowed up his dreams, turning them into nightmares. _

_The walls of the room began closing in around him, and he rolled over abruptly, his arm flying out to feel for Alec, but all he felt was a cold sheet tucked under the pillow. The right side of the bed was freshly made, only where Magnus slept was disturbed. He shook his head panicking, and jumped up out of bed, padding towards the bathroom in his grey pyjamas. __Wait! Grey?__He thought. He looked down at his clothes, completely confused he was wearing such a colour.  
Alec wasn't in the bathroom, so his feet took him out to the hallway. The hallway looked like it stretched for miles in the dark, he was completely disorientated and was running his fingertips over the crevasses in the wall. __Where was Alec? _

_Once at the end of the hallway, it opened out into their open-plan lounge, Alec had always hated all of the colour. Though funnily enough, everything was drained of colour; the rug, couch, pictures of the walls they were all grey and black, pouring such sad emotion into the room. The colours made the room cold and lonely. Something caught Magnus's eye across the room, on a small podium, that he knew had never invested in. He walked slowly towards it, when he realised what was on top, he stopped dead in his tracks. It was an Urn. He took a few small steps forward, his hands shaking at his sides. The name on the Urn, threw him into a loop. _

_"__**Alexander Lightwood."**_

_**1991-2014**_

_Magnus crumpled to the floor without delay, his knees hit the wooden floorboards with a hard crack, but he didn't register the pain. He sat back on his heels, trying to think over how this had even happened, he was absolutely sure he had gone to sleep last night with his Alexander. Though this told otherwise. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and scrolled through the contacts, till he got to Clary. He dialled her number, waiting for her to pick up. She picked on the fifth ring. Her voice was groggy and full of sleep, "Hello, Magnus. What's wrong?" Magnus couldn't hold his voice, it wobbled and broke, as tears ran down his face._

"Clary. Is-is it true? Has Alec really died?" her voice suddenly came clear, in the next moment. 

_"__Ohh Magnus, I'm sorry. I thought you had come to realise he'd gone, but never really left you." Magnus almost dropped the phone, hearing his worst nightmares come true. It was hard to hold himself together, but he had to know._

"How did it happen?" Clary sounded a little confused.

"You know Magnus." Magnus sighed, he didn't know.

"Just tell me again, Biscuit." Clary took-what sounded like-a deep breath, and spoke.

"Magnus, Alec died in the Dark War. It was in Edom, he'd came down to get you from the cell where Sebastian was holding you.. He made it through the door to you, but he was a little too late. You were weak and completely drained of your magic. When he found you, he protected you, until the rest of us could get you, but in the process.. Well an endarkened had came down, and well Alec got killed, sacrificing himself, so you could live." Magnus couldn't hear anymore, he dropped the phone and wept into his hands. _How did he let this happen!__He thought.  
Magnus got up from his knees in an almost trance-like state, picking up the urn and holding it against his heart. He walked slowly back to his room. His mind wandered to memories with Alec, of travelling Europe, at the Eiffel Tower. He thought of when Alec had kissed him for the very first time in Idris, when they were bound together to fight and most of all when Alec had moved in, for good. Tears soaked his face, his eyes were burning from them, he knew he looked a complete mess, but he couldn't care. He'd lost the love of his life and nothing could ever hurt worse than this. Magnus lay on his back on Alec's side of the bed, holding the urn close. _

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_The room began shaking dramatically, the urn fell from his chest and the darkness in the room began being spiked with beams of light. A voice that was quiet at first, getting louder and much more clear, shouting, 'Wake up!'. He felt his eyes peel themselves open, and focus onto the face and body above him, he was sure he'd just laid down with the urn, and no one else had a key other than... Then he realised, he shot up, accidentally knocking the body back. He stared and didn't even realise he was crying until, the other man brushed the tears away. It was his Alec, he was here, he was alive. Magnus threw himself at him, running his hands through his soft inky black hair, holding his face in his vision. He took in all of his features and angles, the way his bright blue eye sparkled against his pale complexion. The way his strong jaw felt, and the way his lips quirked when he smiled. He didn't realise he spoke, at first. _

_"__Magnus, is everything okay? What's wrong?" Magnus shook his head crying and smiling, whispering, "I dreamt you were gone, you weren't here. You'd died.. for me." Alec looked taken back, then blinked, cupping his face in his hands. _

_"__Magnus, look at me. I'm here, I'm well and alive. I'm not going anywhere, and if I had, I would be glad to have saved your life in the process." Magnus smiled a little. He was more content and relieved that his boyfriend was here, and well. _

_"__Alec, please just don't go. I couldn't bare a life without you. If I could be mortal, I would, but I want to promise you something." Alec looked at him, smiling. _

_"__What's that?" Magnus sighed, smiling. _

_"__I am promising you now. Alexander Gideon Lightwood, that when you pass, you wait on the shores of the other world for me, because I promise you I will not be far behind you. I couldn't live my immortal life without you. You are my life. I love you." Magnus looked and saw that Alec had tears in his eyes. _

_"__I could never ask you to give up your life for me, but nor could I ever tell you what and what not to do. Even if I had to wait a thousand years, I'd be sat waiting by the waters edge, waiting for you. I love you too." Magnus pulled him against his chest, pulling them both back onto the quilts, he felt Alec's breathing even out, and his soon followed. He knew he had his Alec, and no dream, however real could tell him otherwise._

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_**Review please! :)**_


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